"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Saturday, November 10, 2012

chariots of snow

from 3pm-1am brennan was puking yesterday.
it was awful.
no one was sleeping.
max was up coughing.
chase was up, i don't know why.
we were up holding the puke bowl for brennan.
the poor little guy thought he was doing something wrong.
we tried to explain that you can't help it when you spew.
he just kept saying sorry, and that he would try harder to not puke.
so sad!!!
finally at midnight we gave him half of a zofran {miracle anti-puking drug}, 
followed by a few ounces of apple juice that he finally kept down for the first time in 9 hours,
and i curled up with him in the spare bed.
he tossed and turned all night long.
mumbled weird things that made me laugh.
i can't remember what.
i think i got an hour here and there.
but i'm always amazed at how little sleep i can function off of.
especially if i get to wake up to fresh snow.
and we're not talking a few inches,
we are talking 10 INCHES!!!!
it was as if the weather knew i needed not just some snow,
but a lot of snow to wake me up after a night like last night.
i stepped out onto my front porch at 6:34am, 
and it looked like something straight out of a movie.
brennan right by my side.
every tree was perfectly flocked with white powder.
all of the colorful fall leaves peaking through the beautifully perfect bright white glow.
like a painting put there on purpose.
not just by miraculous chance.
the tramp in the backyard was so weighed down with snow that it bulged down, 
as if it were trying to rest on the grass. 
the long green grass thick underneath it.
the swings and chairs were chariots of snow.
not a footprint anywhere in sight.
the thick snowflakes were still falling down heavily 
it was quiet.
the most wonderful quiet you'll ever hear.
quiet blankets of snow on everything you can see.
so we spent the morning watching cartoons,
and running out to measure how fast the snow was falling.
i even gave in and turned on the christmas music.
at one point i heard chase crying and found brennan shoving snow down the back of chase's jammies.
naughty brennan!
i blame sean completely. 
i had to send max back three times to get dressed b/c she kept coming out in skirts and shirts.
finally she settled on pink tights and a pink long sleeved shirt to wear under all of her snow gear.
except in the end, 
she ended up taking off all of her snow gear {after i had put it on three times, brennan's too}, 
and played in the snow in her tights with brennan's old fireman rain boots and a pink hat.
the sun came out,
all of the neighborhood kids were throwing snowballs and building snow forts.
sean came home from work and shoveled our driveway and walks.
we drank hot chocolate with whipped cream in the garage.
in white paper cups.
and i thought about how i didn't feel like i had been up the entire night with brennan puking.
3 loads of laundry later,
and i feel confident that we are as germ free as we can be.
and you'll never believe this,
but brennan didn't puke one drop of puke anywhere except in the good ol' bowl.
such a gem.
bless him.
i hope that is the first and last of it.
but not the snow.
more of that please.
glory be.
it was a snowed-IN day:)

now i feel tired.

Friday, November 9, 2012


"mom, it's snowing!!! christmas is tomorrow!!!" -brennan
buckets of snow are falling on both sides of my house.
like blankets of white covering all of our windows.
my furnace just came on,
our snowy day book is out,
and our mugs are ready to be filled with chocolaty warm.
this may even call for some christmas music.
despite my vow to wait until after thanksgiving.
glory be,
it's a snow day:)

Thursday, November 8, 2012

speaking southern

{drinking juice boxes and watching the school bus unload all of the neighborhood kids.}
it's hard to believe that it will be 30* and snowing tomorrow,
when we are in flip flops, short sleeves, and shorts today.
i've been talking to myself in a southern accent lately.
and i'm not talking about talking to myself out loud.
i'm talking about talking in my head.
i've been reading the Divine Secrets of the YA-YA Sisterhood,
and it's got me speaking southern up in my head.
it's relaxing.
i absolutely ADORE saying baby man in my head in my southern accent.
i haven't tried speaking southern out loud,
b/c i'm scared it will ruin the southern party i'm currently having up in my head.
in fact right this very minute,
as i'm typing to you,
i'm typing in my southern accent up in my head.
if i had it my way i'd eat butter cookies dipped in chocolate
 and read a book on my lounger chair every day,
every afternoon.
lately, it is my favorite thing to do if i ever have a minute to sit down.
when i was nursing chase this afternoon i looked down at his blonde eyelashes and his blue eyes,
and i was taken away in his baby man charm.
these are the moments when i'm so glad i'm still nursing.
the times when the big gibbies are causing a stir 
{that is one of my new southern phrases i've taken on--causing a stir},
pouring cereal all over my kitchen floor,
or barging in and jumping on the bed,
making it impossible for chase to ever focus on drinking milk EVER AGAIN from my boob.
those are the times i want to quit.
but these little moments in the afternoon,
when my house in quiet and still,
and those little blonde eyelashes and blue eyes are looking up at me,
i'm in the dreamiest of dream lands,
with my southern accent writing the script of it all up in my head.
and then baby man starts his happy squawk {i had to spell check that}.
not annoying in the least,
just the most darling little squawk you've ever heard.
where he fluctuates to so many levels of baby talking pitch,
that he leaves you smiling in adoration b/c you know you have the most genius baby to have ever lived, talking to you right at that moment.
and then he'll turn to me during his squawk,
with his bright eyes all lit up,
and then his dimples will start to set in where his cheeks begin,
and all i can do is breathe in the most euphoric moment of my entire day.
nursing baby man chase ray,
with a southern accent up in my head,
and the sweetest little talking baby squawk you ever did hear.

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

raining leaves.

 the same great sidewalk, 
lined with the same great trees,
with the same great kids 
i'm so sad
didn't win.

Tuesday, November 6, 2012


doing my civic duty.
i'm proud to be an american.
for at least i know i'm free.

Monday, November 5, 2012

sunflower patch

 max came down the stairs this morning with a pair of underwear in her hands.
"i'm ready mom!"
in her high pitch, happy voice.
big smile on her face.
i tried to talk her out of it,
{really, i did. i was not ready.}
but she insisted.
and i figured,
we might as well give it a go before we clean the carpets again.
{and for sure i thought she'd give up after a few hours.}
it was not so.
she's stickin' with it.
i hate potty training.
dun, dun, dun. 

but i do love how cute they are the first time they wear underwear.
so far we're 0-5.
the underwear is losing.
poor chaps.
in other news...
i have an entire garden patch of sunflowers growing.
like me,
they have no idea was season it is right now.
whoever heard of November temperature highs in Utah in the 70's?!
so very
i give you,
my sunflower patch...
{don't mind the weeds}
snow this weekend.
goodbye sunflower patch.
hello warm, cozy, snow fall.
and warm, cozy fall.
i am happy to announce that our brand new furnace was installed last week.
just in time for this upcoming weekend's temperatures.
{check out all of the rust from the dang leaky AC--BOO!!!}
feels so fancy i can hardly contain myself.
we haven't really needed to use it with our glamorous summer weather we've been having,
but sometimes in the morning i turn it on just for fun to warm us up a few degrees.
it's the simple things,
like warm bums and noses.