"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Friday, September 11, 2015

i was 18

i was 18
and a freshmen at chico state.
up early doing homework on my laptop.
my roommate was asleep still.
i didn't have any of the lights on because i didn't want to wake her.
and then somebody was knocking on my door really loud.
i couldn't figure out why anyone would be waking us up at 7am on a tuesday.
ashlee had to tell me twice because i didn't understand what she was saying.
we watched the second plane hit on live television as we walked into her room.
i remember listening to the terror in the announcers voice as we all realized it was no accident.
we spent the rest of the day huddled around the giant big screen box television
in the game room on the bottom floor of whitney hall watching the news.
classes didn't get cancelled until later that day.
i remember i went to nutrition 101 at 11am,
and the teacher sent us back home.
where were you?

the story of how i DID NOT MEAN to can 38 quarts of peaches

this is the story 
of the 38 quarts of peaches 
i didn't mean to can.
here it goes...
our peaches ripened on our tree.
all 5 of them.
{thank you frost.}
sean said brigham city peaches and peach stand.
and i said two boxes, 
unless you can help me with an extra box for the peach raspberry jam?
this is what i said to him when he called from the peach stand.
and he was all "yeah! of course!"
{famous last words}
we like to can together you see.
so he bought three cups of raspberries too.
i was SO excited.
long story short,
sean went to take a nap to get rid of his headache,
{usually this requires ibu profien, a coke, and an hour snooze}
so i said i'd get started doing all of the prep work while he took care of his headache.
next thing i knew,
sean was barfing,
having hot and cold flashes,
body aches,
and i had three boxes of peaches we actually PAID for 
that had already been skinned, pitted, and halved.
and 4 kids at home on a sunday.
with a breastfeeding newborn.
it was either can them by myself or throw them all away.
i just wanted to cry,
but instead i put my shoulder to the wheel,
and let my kids watch movies for the rest of the day.
it wasn't pretty.
and at one point when dean didn't want to go to bed for the night i considered waking my neighbor andrea up in the middle of the night to help.
i did not, and dean finally fell asleep in the swing.
around midnight sean woke up for a gatorade and some nyquil,
and maybe i made him a piece of toast???
i can't remember...
38 quarts later at 1:30am i never wanted to see another peach in my whole entire life.

i'm sure glad i have them now,
all happily stacked downstairs in the cold storage by the water heater,
but i don't EVER want them to happen like that EVER again.
i give you,
my peach recipe,
courtesy of my neighbor julie who taught me how;)
the pictures make me laugh! 
notes: i don't make the syrup. i boil a pot of water and put 1/8c sugar {bc i don't really see why it needs any sugar really, but julie said to so i did} 
with 1/2tbls fruit fresh in each quart {so they don't turn brown in the bottles over the winter}, 
stack it with the peaches, and THEN ladle in boiling water to the half inch head space line.
no mess. you're welcome. also, process an extra 10 minutes for utah altitude.
if you want to learn the ins and outs.
there's only one rule to canning.
the the is: FOLLOW THE RULES. 
that's the only rule;)
the end.

Thursday, September 10, 2015

i did not

a few weeks ago when i was making dinner 
i looked out my kitchen window at the sink 
and saw brennan sitting on the little kid picnic table.
he must have snuck off outside while i was switching the laundry.
this is what i was thinking.
i went to go call him back inside for homework,
but when i opened the door i could hear zac.
playing guitar on his back steps and singing.
and that's when i realized that brennan was just sitting there in secret.
it was so quiet outside.
you couldn't hear anything else.
i don't know if i've ever seen brennan be so still ever.
and in the busy world he's growing up in,
i thought about how rare it is to just sit and listen.
i did not call him back to his homework;)

Wednesday, September 9, 2015

max was here.

i found him like this.
earring just on the left side.
also, please note the pink triangle jewel.
oh to have your very own ALIVE baby doll.

Tuesday, September 8, 2015

if i were a baby, i think that would be heaven.

{dean be like "you my food truck ma."}
last night was the first night that was cold in the house.
fall is coming!
i repeat: FALL IS COMING!!!
the burning bush plants off the back porch have started to change their leaves to red.
and the pumpkin leaves on the vine have started to dry out.
the days are getting shorter,
and my jeans are feeling less sweaty during the day.
the AC is turned off, so things get hot around bed time.
like we are all grouchy getting everyone into bed at night after showers,
and a little sweaty.
because he rises you know.
and that's where we get everyone ready for bed.
on the very top level of the west facing multi-tri house.
why we don't shower them in the basement this time of year is beyond my comprehension.
i guess we'd rather die from heat than carry the shampoo and conditioner down to the basement.
so when sean and i were brushing our teeth around 9pm,
feel really hot and agitated like i get in the heat you know,
he was all, "why don't i close all the windows and turn on the AC already?"
and i was all, "cause in a couple of hours we are all going to be freezing from the windows being open and it will be a waste!"
and also, i was picturing our power bill being below $100:)
so i was mostly focusing on that.
i can almost see it now...
so as we sweat our brains out at 9pm in our WEST FACING multi-tri house until october,
nobody wants more than underwear on to fall asleep.
including baby dean.
feel the burn.
i'll probably give in soon.
like tonight.
because i'm making enchiladas.
and ain't NOBODY can push through the september evening sun
in a west facing multi-tri house
with the oven on.
so anyway,
the AC's been off.
and baby dean's pajamas consist of a diaper and a onesie.
and around 4am that little man woke up for his middle of the night snack.
freezing cold.
and this is one of my most FAVORITE things that happens with a baby that nurses in the night.
it only happens once when the weather changes because you're not ready for it.
this is how utah weather is you see.
one day it's summer,
and then all of a sudden it's not.
and then sometimes it will be summer again,
and you'll change your clothes at lunch.
so anyway, last night it switched from summer to fall during the night,
and baby dean woke up with freezing legs and arms.
because he's broken out of his swaddle in the night.
in his onesie that he was sweating in at bedtime,
and the fan in the closet where he sleeps has made him colder than a 7-11 cooler.
it's a big closet, it's a dark closet, and he loves it,
don't be alarmed.
so sean brought me that freezing baby,
and the air in our room was so crisp and fresh from fall that is flirting with us outside.
and our bed was all warm and cozy.
it was SO cozy and warm.
so i pulled that baby into my warm sheets,
right up against my body.
like i brought my big ol' comforter right up and over his shoulders
and his little freezing body curled right up to mine,
and i could hear him sigh a little bit,
like, "have mercy, this is the best day of my life!"
this is what i think he was thinking.
and while i nursed him laying down in bed,
his little arms and legs slowly warmed up on my skin.
and i just think he's probably having the best time of his entire life.
warming up on his mom's skin,
drinking milk.
because if i were a baby,
i think that would be heaven.
and then when he was all done,
he of course barfed half of it up onto himself, sean, and the floor.
so sean changed his soaking wet onesie,
threw a burp cloth over the wet spot on the floor,
and then i had him get me a pair of little baby pants to put on him.
that little baby dean was looking up at me smiling and warm,
and i was just so happy to have this baby in my bed.
then i bundled him up in his blanket,
kissed him on his nose between his eyes,
laid him in his bassinet,
and added an extra blanket on top.
because being cold and freezing 
is only something i want to happen once 
on accident 
in the middle of the night.
oh happy day:)