"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Saturday, April 20, 2013

Friday, April 19, 2013

3.14 {THE PIE}

tonight i let someone else do the pizza cooking for me.
chicken bacon and ranch {to be exact}.
sweet heaven above!!!
a table by the fire on the outdoor covered patio,
live music,
acoustic guitar {to be exact},
which brennan now wants to play "b/c it's a cool guy thing."
and all of our favorite songs.
we sat there refilling everyone's vanilla root beers,
brennan spilled his once all over the floor,
max almost spilled hers twice,
{and had to go pee twice},
and chase drooled his down his lap trying to drink from a straw like it was a bottle of milk.
but nobody cared,
b/c we were singing along to our favorite songs,
drinking soda,
and eating chicken bacon and ranch pizza.
at our favorite pizza joint.
and then we sat in the car in the garage for ten minutes when we got home,
watching the end of wreck it ralph, 
like it was our very own drive in.

everybody thinks you're one whole piece

2 or 3 years old.
with our horse.
"i try to believe," she said, "that God doesn't give you more than one little piece of the story at once. you know, the story of your life. otherwise your heart would crack wider than you could handle. he only cracks it enough so you can still walk, like someone wearing a cast. but you've still got a crack running up your side, big enough for a sapling to grow out of. only no one sees it. Nobody sees it. everybody thinks you're one whole piece, and so they treat you maybe not so gentle as they would if they could see that crack." 
{Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood pg. 242}

Thursday, April 18, 2013


dear brennan,
last week you wrote your first story board at home.
you drew everyone in our family, plus cade.
and then later max had you go back and add caitlyn.
then you wrote words across the top,
and called it your story.
and wanted me to read it after you were done.
you even drew chase with his legs crawling {third picture on the right}.
you are so smart.
scary smart!
i am SO proud of how creative you are with everything that you do.
but especially of how you draw.
you are fearless when it comes to drawing.
there is nothing that you won't try.
i always wanted to be a good drawer.
and i marvel at your skill.
yesterday you brought home a book that you made at preschool.
my favorite part was where you drew a black storm cloud and a yellow lightening bolt.
you told me you came up with all on your own,
and were especially proud to point out that neither miss kim nor miss jamie helped you do it.
you did it all by yourself.
i hung it on the fridge next to the stove so that i could look at it every time i make dinner.
i love to have you tell me about your pictures.
what colors you used,
what people you put in them,
and then i hope and pray that you won't lose your creativity in drawing.
a special gift that most people lose confidence in over time.
so that's what i wish,
for you to keep drawing.
to keep telling your stories on blank pieces of white paper.
as many times a day as you'd like.

love mom

Wednesday, April 17, 2013

look up YO.

{chase, max, brennan, cade, me}
an elevator with mirrors on the top.
we went up and down twice it was so much fun.
and then i felt soooooo seasick.
can't take my motion sickness self anywhere.

Tuesday, April 16, 2013

letters to Beth {boston, tale of two siblings, & 10 trick pony}

Dear Beth,
something horrible happened in boston yesterday.
two bombs were set off at the end of the boston marathon.
we watched the news last night, and it was horrific.
it looked like something that would happen in someone else's country.
not america.
the streets were bloody.
you are sitting there on your couch watching the footage of the bomb going off,
b/c of course they have video of it actually happening,
and i just kept thinking,
i want to go back to being 10,
and catching fireflies in my grandparent's backyard in the humid iowa summer.
to a time when the world was more simple.
or at least to a time when i wasn't aware of anything like this going on.
i can't stop thinking about the families of those who were lost.
i haven't watched anything this morning,
but as of last night there were 3 people dead,
one of which was an 8 year old boy,
and over 140 people wounded.
and we are not talking about scrapes and bruises.
the news was saying that many people lost their limbs.
it sounds so cliche, but i keep praying for peace.
for them.
for me.
and then i see my kids running around carefree,
jumping on the tramp,
drinking their smoothies and eating their peanut butter toast this morning,
and that is where i have found my peace.
even though my heart is still heavy.

it is spring here in Utah.
this is my favorite week of the entire spring season.
Powder Puff blossom week.
that's what i have named it.
the whites, pinks, and purples are popping out everywhere.
i even saw a bush with flowering magnolia's or something that looked like it should be named a magnolia when we were driving out of church on sunday.
i so badly want to pull my car over everywhere we go to take pictures of all of the different blossoming varieties, but i can only allow my crazy to go so far, and on sunday i just can't push crazy any further when we are leaving church at 5:15pm with tired, cranky, hungry gibson's.
it has also been snowing for the past two days,
and it's supposed to snow again tomorrow.
in fact,
i just turned around to look out my kitchen windows and i can see white flakes starting to fall.
i saw on the news that the mountains could get something like 18" this week from this storm.
and this my friend is why i love living in utah so much.
you get the best of both worlds.
you get all four seasons in one month.
never need to worry about getting sick of one temperature for too long b/c the weather will surely change.
just wait 5 minutes or drive 5 miles.
i LOVE it.
love where you live.
and i do.
it doesn't stop my kids from going outside in their underwear.
nothing would stop them from that.
i love the way the snow looks when it falls on the green grass.
so pretty.
i have lots to catch you up on.
chase broke my wireless router hook up-ie thing,
which is why i haven't been able to write you back.
my computer has not seen the internet for 4 days.
it was nice to ignore it for a few days,
but i'm so glad it's back now.

most exciting news:
brennan went to kindergarten orientation!
i sat in the auditorium with hundreds of parents 
and soon to be fellow kindergartners with brennan.
he was so cute.
he kept pointing to his name tag 
and asking me about the basketball hoops and why they were inside the school.
we gave them our packet of birth certificate and immunizations right in front of the third grade classrooms,
and for about 5 seconds i missed teaching school.
that feeling passed.
max and brennan are the best of friends and the worst of friends.
the tale of two siblings.
that's what i'm calling it.
mr. wallace would be so proud.
they are either playing and loving each other,
or screaming and fighting like cats and dogs.
it's great when it's great.
and those are the moments i enjoy b/c it is the cutest most wonderful thing i have ever seen.
they told me they were bored last week,
so i handed them rags and sprayed the walls,
and they started wiping all of my walls down.
max was less impressed.
brennan loved it so much that he even did a few of the baseboards for me.
and then there's the baby man.
he turned 1!
i love his little face.
he is always hanging onto my legs or in my arms.
he is my tiny baby man boyfriend.
and he is all over the place.
100% of his time.
right now he is chasing a cup of teddy grahams around the kitchen floor behind me.
he is like a puppy.
he eats shoes and CHASEs balls.
it is THE CUTEST CUTEST thing.
he is a 10 trick pony.
that's what i told the pediatrician.
his tricks are never ending.
my favorite thing to do with him is to pass a ball back and forth between the two of us.
he lifts up his little arms and squeeze his cheeks and face together.
he gets so excited for you to give him that ball that he smiles REALLY REALLY big and shakes in excitement.
he does the same thing when we go to pick him up.

his favorite thing is to push things down the little stairs,
and then try to launch himself head first down them to get whatever it is that he has thrown.
for example: the teddy grahams just went sky diving down them.
brennan and max are a big help in this department.
soon he will learn to go down the stairs backwards and then i will worrying about the big kids leaving the door to the basement open.
i got a big piece of carpet from my cousin's carpet store to put on the floor down there,
and my kids have made themselves a bonefied play room.
it's awesome.
no need to finish my basement now.
sean set up the treadmill next to the punching bag,
and my little white tv/vcr combo on the old mini fridge from my teaching days,
and vwallah,
we have ourselves a little gibson gym.
sean and i put up the tramp a few weeks ago.
that is for sure the kid gym.
linsey and i put up the enclosure.
it was quite the rubbix cube, let me tell you.
we had all of those sticks laid out on the grass trying to get everything to go into the right ends.
so that when we put the circle together it would all fit right.
my tired mom brain was struggling.
sean gave our front yard the first mow over the weekend.
the grass is already so green and growing like crazy!
my peas have started popping up as well, despite my lack of attention to them.
i have completely forgotten about them,
and yet they are still growing.
the snow keeps watering them and they love it.
do you remember the tomato plant talk from conference?
well, my tomato plants were drooping and wilting that morning before conference started,
and i watered them,
and wondered if they would lift back up.
and then that talk came on,
and i looked over at my tomato plants,
and there they were,
standing up and thriving.
amazing water. 
and that my friend is what i am doing to help make the world a better place this morning.
amidst the tragedy in boston.
i will water my little children.
with all of the love and patience i can muster.
and when i can't muster any more patience,
i'll water them some more.
and then i'll do it all over again tomorrow.
and the next day.
and the next.
b/c i know that the only way to fight evil is with good.
and these tiny babies we are raising and full of good.
happy birthday and congratulations to bryce on graduating!
exciting EXCITING times for you and your family!!!
i am so happy for you guys!
do you know if you're coming home yet?
staying longer?
i am secretly wishing for you to be coming home:)

oh the story of smith at the restaurant.
HAHAHAHA my dear. i have SOOOOO been there.
except it was with chase,
but it also required an all hands on deck changing crew.
god bless sean's older sister.
and a sink with soap and water.
click here my friend, with caution, bahahaha.
sean and i both agree that Liechtenstein is the most fun thing to say on the entire planet. 
your pictures make me want to travel!
i yearn to walk those cobblestone streets you are walking.
or pushing your stroller on.
i envision life as slower and more quiet on cobblestone streets.
but not quiet as in quiet.
just quiet as in different.
the colors in Prague, MY MY.
i never knew i wanted to go there.
but now i know i do.
i check skype twice a day in the hopes that you will be on,
and the stars will align,
so we can video talk.
fingers crossed!
and aubrey's baby!!!
what a sweet sweet boy!
that little newborn face made me yearn for another baby:)
and then chase woke up 50 times last night,
and i remembered i still have one:)
love to you and yours,


Sunday, April 14, 2013


they took matters into their own hands.
pirate booty.
does a BOOTY good.