"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Thursday, April 2, 2015

HBD Baby Man {3}

dear chase,
you are forever my baby man.
with chub-a-chubs for daaaaayzzzz.
my favorite place to kiss you is your upper lip.
i love your big fat neck and your delicate ears.
you have red hair with blonde patches.
the longer your hair, the more red it looks.
you have little freckles that started this year on your nose.
like little auburn spinkles on the bridge of your nose between your eyes.
i'm in love with your colors.
you are the sweetest child.
we call you King Cuddle.
you hate it.
you usually yell at us "doooon't callll me KING!! CUDDLE!!!!"
really high pitched and mad.
you mostly boss us around all day.
especially me.
i adore you for it.
you hate all vegetables.
i will keep trying.
this week you finally started eating carrots.
and also, sometimes you poop in the potty.
you are the funniest kid.
i remember when you were born,
like 30 seconds old,
thinking you looked like you had a good sense of humor.
i was soooo right.
you make us laugh and laugh and laugh.
the comedian with no fear.
that's what i tell people about you.
i love the way you say "uh huh!"
it's the sweetest sound with the most darling little inflection,
and you say it instead of yes every time.
when you are all grown up i will miss hearing you say it, i just know it.
you love whipped cream in your mouth straight from the can.
you will go open the fridge, open you mouth, say "ah ah", and point into your open mouth and then at the whipped cream can and just look at me with eyes i just can't say no to.
sometimes i say no, you throw yourself onto the ground and sob.
then you ask me to hold you.
you would cuddle all day.
it's your favorite thing on the planet.
you love blankets, sippies with milk, and your "B".
you love to rub the tag of your blue dog binky on your nose, your face, your ear hole,
on other people's faces if you REALLY like them.
you will not eat a booger.
you will always bring them to me on your finger or your B tag and patiently wait for me to get a kleenex. i greatly appreciate this trait in you, and wonder when the other kids will stop picking their noses and eating it.
you have this little dance move where you sort of hop forward around the room like you're galloping with one foot, dragging the other one behind.
it's hilarious and we all laugh until we cry because you're just so cute doing it.
there was never a sweeter baby than you.
of course your siblings are sweet, but there's something extra special about you and your sweetness.
i've never seen a more kind hearted, nurturing child ever.
you LOVE babies and puppies.
you will sit and hold a baby for 15 minutes and not move.
you just want to sit and hold them, kiss their heads, and rock them.
i've never seen anything like it.
you are pretty much a puppy.
you love to dig the dirt up with your hands so it goes back between your legs.
you roll around on the ground and love your belly scratched.
you fetch pretty well,
and you love to run around in circles.
you put your blue car bucket over your head so you can't see and walk into walls because it makes people laugh and you like that.
you belly laugh the entire time.
like i said, comedian.
you are friendly to everyone.
you wave, you say hello.
all the time.
you make people happy.
just having you around can lift the saddest person into a happy place.
it's a gift, i'm convinced.
for real.
you come up to dad and me in the kitchen, hug one leg of each of us and say "i love you guys."
then snuggle into our legs and cuddle there for a bit.
i will forever remember you carrying your sippy of milk under your arm like a football everywhere you go.
no child has ever loved milk like you.
or a binky.
it's an intense relationship, and i have ever intention of letting you have it for the rest of the year.
no worries my friend, i'm on your side.
you call max "mama max."
she is your best friend.
you come out of your room in the mornings, shut your door {this is how we know it's you who's up when we hear the sound of the door closing in the hall}, and then come in and yell at us for milk and max.
you think you're 7.
like really.
you talk like you're 7.
it's really funny, except when you say the naughty things that the big kids have taught you.
you love looking at yourself in other people's sunglasses.
you love to bury your face into my shoulder, but NOT with my hair there.
you insist on sweeping it away.
there cannot be even a single strand.
you like 4 breakfasts,
one bite of lunch,
and basically no dinner.
which usually ends with us giving you bread and butter before bed.
you love to eat butter straight.
i once caught you a fourth of the way through a cube on the counter.
you love spiderman.
also, you love to dress up in princess and fairy clothes with max.
you love baby dolls and cars.
i've never seen a boy love cars like you.
if you don't get your 2 hours of driving cars around the coffee table a day you're just not fully acclimated to your day.
you HATE being left out.
you're a very thorough hand washer.
up to the elbows every time.
you want to do everything BY YOURSELF.
about a week ago i've finally been able to start reasoning with you.
usually i say you do this.
you say no.
i say you do this and threaten to take away something or say i'm going to come get you to do it.
then you say, "oooohhhhh---kkkaaaaaayyyyy."
and come do what i've asked.
except when you won't,
which is usually when we are late to pick someone up from school.
or i'm trying to get to the grocery store before it's time to pick someone up from school.
you love to nap.
i think it's mostly because you know you're getting your B.
you can climb like nobody's business.
so strong it's amazing.
you can hoist yourself up onto anything,
climb up anything,
and i pretty much think you're capable of pull ups on the monkey bars right now.
you love treats and sweets.
if you see a treat or sweet or a kid on the side of the road you will very passionately say, "I LOVE THAT!!!!!"
your favorite movie is cars 2.
you ask to watch it every morning when brennan leaves for school.
you went through a big hero 6 phase for about a week,
and then you returned to cars 2.
you love your mcqueen car and your "miss-aisle" car.
you panic when you don't know where they are.
you hate getting into your carseat.
you love to be naked.
you love peeing outside.
you love buzz lightyear.
he's the only thing that's gotten you to poop on the potty with any sort of consistency.
once i figure THAT out it was 99% of the battle solved.
your face is just so so so so cute.
i love to watch you play,
i love to watch your face do anything.
you love to run.
you love to ride your trike out front.
you jump on the tramp like a big kid,
and when the big kids slam into you,
you come running for me with big crocodile tears,
ask me to hold you,
and where is your binky and your milk.
every time.
you love to be held.
just like when you were a baby.
i love to hold you.
i love to cuddle you.
in the mornings you climb into bed with me,
curl up in my chest and overgrown baby belly,
and just lay there for as long as i will let you.
saturdays we can last an hour if we don't have to go anywhere.
you don't need anything except your binky and to be covered in my blankets.
i love it more than anything right now.
you love to be read to.
especially mater, mcqueen, and super hero books.
you love the library.
it used to be because of the toys,
but now you get that you can bring home books and you love to pick them out and then demand specific books you remember picking out.
your memory is amazing.
even at 3 you will tell me something you remember from 6 months ago.
you know the way to grandma carol's house,
and when we get within 6 blocks you start yelling, "we go to gamma carol house?!?! i WUV that!"
you still make the same newborn sounds you made when you were a tiny newborn baby.
i love those little sounds.
you remember everyone's names always.
from brennan's friends, to the secretary at his school, to the workers in our house finishing the basement, to all of the kid's friends, and you always say hello and goodbye to everyone.
you love to be outside.
you can play toys by yourself for hours.
you have two little friends in the neighborhood you play with.
you call everyone "ethan" like your cousin ethan.
they are the only names you don't remember, but one of your friend's names is IAN, so it sounds like ethan and it just works.
you love to "go to friend's house and PAY cars."
your favorite breakfast is pancakes.
if you don't like something you just spit it out, with your tongue hanging out.
there's no talking you into eating something you don't like.
this pretty much drives us nuts.
you call dusty crophopper "dusty POP-HOPPER."
that was your favorite movie for a month straight.
it may have been a more serious addiction than cars 2...
you are my most opinionated child, which says a lot coming from this family.
you are the first gibson that got to just be a baby.
i have never enjoyed a baby like i've enjoyed you.
also, you've been my hardest kid for the last 8 months,
mostly because you've been completely NOT bribe-able,
and i don't really know what to do with that,
so you cried a lot, and i cuddled you a lot after you were done crying on the floor a lot,
and it was pretty great when you finally stopped crying a lot.
you turned me into a real bonefied grown up.
made me a grown woman of sorts.
at least where motherhood crosses over from youthful playing house to this crap's for real now.
and i mean that in a GOOD way.
in the most meaningful way my heart can probably never express into words kind of way.
our bond is so strong right now.
i know you love me more than anyone in your life.
it's amazing.
i wish it could last forever.
you ask me to put you to bed every night.
then you kiss me, hug me, and when i'm walking out you tell me you love me.
i love you baby man chase ray.
happy birthday.
love, mom
above: the "he looks like he's gonna have a good sense of humor" picture.

i can't believe how little brennan and max were.

without further ado...
i give you 
chase's 3rd "birthday day"!
which is what he called it all day long.
"it my birthday day! i one!"

the end.

Tuesday, March 31, 2015


so i failed my glucose test.
and eric made megan call me to tell me today.
because for sure i wouldn't have believed him if HE would have called.
because he already played that trick on me once.
and here i am with my perfectly round belly feeling like i just got an F on my midterm.
and it's kind of got me a little depressed.
cause aint nobody likes failing a test.
especially not one that requires you to take a 3 hour test.
with fasting.
and 4 blood draws.
and everything that comes with it if you don't pass that one.
this 4th baby man,
he's changing all the rules.