"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Monday, February 10, 2014

dear max, you're grounded for life. love, mom.

i wake up.
it's monday.
max is screeching at me.
can she paint NOW!?
really high pitched.
so hard to wake up to that.
where is dad?
she can't find him.
he's not running,
he's not in the bathroom.
can i just say how proud i was of her that she knew to check those two spots?
car battery dead.
i found that out last night.
when i went to hear emily freeman speak.
and i tried to take his car.
he must be charging his battery.
that's what i told her.
off she ran.
she didn't come back.
i rolled over and cuddled under my blankets again.
cue chase screaming.
it's monday.
vacation is over.
and i just don't want to get out of bed.
chase screams louder.
sean comes in and asks if i can come watch his car in the driveway while it runs for 10 more minutes.
is there anyway you can do it?
that's what i said back.
'cause my bed,
max is screeching now at him if he can do her minnie mouse puzzle with him.
and being the awesome
most amazing
top notch guy that is he is,
he took care of his ladies.
that's what he did.
that's what he said.
so he went downstairs to do the puzzle with max by the front window so he could also watch the car.
and then i was like,
emily, if sean gets too enthralled in the minnie mouse puzzle that he isn't watching when the person walks up and steals his car you'll be all mad at yourself that you were laying in bed.
so with one eye open i stumbled into the hall.
i stumbled a little too far to the right in fact.
so far that i veered off to the bathroom in the hall.
and just as i reached for the door to chase's room my brain all of a sudden registered that my foot was wet.
this required my other eye to open.
and i was like,
"sean, why is the carpet wet up here?"
and he was like,
and then i patted my foot around and it was wet A LOT.
like all over a lot.
like 4 feet out into the hall and 5 feet wide to the walls and into the hall closet a lot.
and now that my two eyes were open and dialating whatever which way they dialate in the light,
big to small?
is that it?
i turned on the light and the water was overflowing,
stuffed to the gills with toilet paper.
and i'm all,
"max!!!! did you flood the toilet last night or this morning?!?!"
and she was like,
"i didn't do it!!!"
and i was all,
"sean, she flooded it last night when she wouldn't go to bed!"
and he came running up with towels and a plunger.
while he mopped the bathroom i interrogated max.
finally she fessed up.
it was last night.
then because i had to pee and sean had the upstairs handled i wandered into the downstairs bathroom to this:
it was flooding
i think i swore.
i'm almost positive i swore out loud.
i for sure swore in my head.
and somewhere in there i must have been yelling
probably over and over a few times
because sean came running down the stairs yelling
and then he was right next to me
and i was like,
"we're gonna need to call somebody."
and he was like,
"i'll get my BNI book."
that's his marketing group.
it's amazing.
he always "knows a guy."
and a good guy.
and gals.
lots of them.
very handy.
so he called his guy,
and he came out 30 minutes later.
they used their water wall beeping machine and found out how far down the water was,
and what we were dealing with on this fine monday morning.
they popped the water bubble,
drained it out,
pulled our carpet back upstairs,
and shoved some fans in.
then i called his fixer guy, and now we wait for it all to dry.
i'm a poet, and i didn't know it.
he tells me it's a 3 step process with lots of waiting to dry.
these are the times i really love living in a dry climate.
to be continued...
being home from vacations always sucks,
but i think this is a little extra sucky.
still, i'm so glad that this is all i'm dealing with today.
really. i'm serious.
"count your blessings, name them one by one."
how was your monday?
dear max,
you're grounded 
for life.

1 comment:

Amy said...

Oh man, that is crazy!!! Glad you have real life super heroes who fixed it all for you!