without the vultures

the vultures are out to get my money.
at least that's what it felt like as i perusing bathroom soaps this afternoon.
sean was at home with the kids while they napped.
i envied my last year's self that was too poor to spend money.
the self that just got to enjoy the holiday season without the stresses of gift giving.
we had/got to opt out of all it.
and put a limit on brennan of less than $20.
$10 for eachother.
we could have gotten him nothing,
and us nothing,
but we wanted to have a little fun.
so we budgeted it into to our tiny little nest egg.
and today, i felt anxious.
the need to add the stress of gift giving back into my holiday season.
no sir,
i will not.
but how to find the happy medium???
b/c i really do enjoy giving gifts.
watching someone open a gift i've given.
or receiving a thank you note from the happy opener.
although, sometimes i feel like i'm the only one sending thank you notes.
which may be b/c i haven't been giving much lately.
just receiving.
how grateful we are for everything we've received.
thank you just hasn't felt like enough.
how much i LOVE to receive.
to give thanks.
open presents.
oh, how i love to open presents.
which i cannot if no one gives.
which everyone else cannot if i don't give.
but somewhere there's a place where in the middle,
where the gift is not the thing that matters.
which is what i really love about christmas anyway.
the spirit of christmas.
the feeling it brings.
the feeling of home.
and comfort.
and joy.
for the gift of my deepest spiritual beliefs.
adding to the list of "new": giving.
but without the vultures.

inundating.

christmas marketing ads.
inundating our tv.
frightening.

bless those scouts.

i can finally appreciate the scouts that woke up at 6am to have this flag on my lawn.
happy veteran's day.
bless those scouts.
blueberry pancakes for brekie.
per beiber fever's request.

the beauty box

i escaped to the beauty box while the kids took naps.
babysitting courtesy of mama nacho.
and it was there that i discovered how i'd forgotten the simple pleasure of hair pampering.
the feeling of sitting under a dryer with nothing to do, trashy gossip magazines a plenty.
i spent the entire time busy on my phone.
no one to attend to.
solitaire,
sending my self portraits to my regulars.
it still didn't cure the bewitching hours when i came home.
5:30-8 really takes it out of me.
good thing my hair is pretty.
b/c the good lord knows that greasy, undone hair makes everything feel worse.
i guess this means we've made it another day.

3 for beiber fever

7 minutes in heaven.
not the dark closet.
or the kissing.
just playing cars on the play mat.
max stole herself a beach cruiser.
brennan stole it back.
she whined and found an electric blue dump truck with motorcycles in the trunk.
i had the ambulance.
beiber fever had 3 to himself.
and after four trips around the mat i was totally bored.
but man,
they really loved it.

silly rabbit, tricks are for kids.

" i don't need no stinkin' dolls."

pump you up.

i mean, really.
have you ever seen a creature arch their back more beautifully???
she's slightly anemic too.
and in the 10th percentile for weight.
brennan was over 20lbs by her age.
and in the 90 something percentile.
and anemic as well.
but he didn't get the drops.
she gets the drops.
the awesome iron drops.
and brown stains on clothes b/c i'll be too lazy to use a bib.
and orange juice.
all of the orange juice she wants.

or anything for that matter.

genetic parenting.

he wanted blake's race car first.

then he wanted the garbage truck first.

then...you get it.

being a parent is utterly horrifying.
the good days are when they say please and thank you without being told.
that has to be my AWESOME parenting skills.
the bad days are when you're trying to get a 2 1/2 yr old to not cry every time he doesn't get his way.
that has to be genetics.
thank goodness for my friends who love us just the way we are.

sean finally covered his mouth so the birthday boy could blow out his own candles.

it's a good thing they're best buds.

forgiving.

FLASH

corn mazes friday.
snow wednesday.
fall will be gone in a flash.
maybe that's why we get to have thanksgiving and christmas right as the weather gets cold.
they just warm everything up.
not that i mind the cold.
or the snow.
i love them both.
those big flakes.
turn my frown upside down.

bum buzzed

he doesn't care about the potty.
but he loves to wear the pants.