poker face

the helicopter sounds scare max.

poor thing.

i want a refund for the last three days.
and when i say days,
i mean nights.
both kids are sick.
isn't it summer?!
i mean may.
either way colds and flu should be gone by now.
we are over colds and flu as far as my mind is concerned.
we've been in bathing suits all week for heaven's sake!
so for the last three nights,
brennan has taken to coming into our room at
1:30am
2am
3am
3:30am,
then max wakes up crying b/c she can't breathe out of her nose either,
which we ignored,
bc she is still in a blessed crib.
trapped.
glory be!
then Brennan comes back in crying around 5am
for the fiftieth time,
at which point last night i bribed him to go back to bed,
promising him that we could go to the discovery museum in the morning.
b/c at 5am there are really only two options: bribes vs. threats.
and threats never go the way i want anway.
so i bribed.
with the discovery museum.
which i absolutely did not plan on actually doing.
i mean really, didn't you just hear me say i have two kids with colds?
but he remembered {we'll get to that later}.
and then max was at the crying again.
so i swore we'd go if he'd just go back to bed.
and did he need dad to tuck him back in?
the next thing we knew,
he ran out of the room and we didn't hear from him again.
"you're not really going to take him are you?" sean said.
"no way, he'll forget by tomorrow." i said,
and then i rolled over and turned off the monitor.
i knew max was fine.
and would eventually fall back asleep.
and told sean that if brennan came in again i might yell,
so we'd better plan on him taking the reins for the next round.
mean mom was all i knew i was going to be able to muster,
and that was going to get us nowhere.
and then Brennan came in again sometime after the sun came up,
at which point i finally waved the white flag
and agreed to let him get into bed
and fall back asleep.
bc once the sun is up,
my bed is fair game.
so i finally let him climb into bed.
he snuggled right up to me.
stole MY pillow.
and we slept until after 9.
we are now all grumpy with snotty noses
AND we had to go to the discovery museum
bc the kid remembered,
and reminded me about fifty times,
and there was no negotiating another bribe,
post bribe given.
b/c he went back to bed in his bed,
this is what he told me.
{which he did in fact do}
so "he gets to go to discovery."
which we didn't even get to until well past noon.
i just didn't want to lose that bargaining power in the middle of the night,
and i didn't want to be a liar.
and let's be completely honest here.
i didn't want to spend the day listening to two kids whine and cry in the privacy of my own home.
i'd rather do it out in public where all eyes can judge  empathize with me.
really, it was our only bad option.
so i had to show my poker cards and play.
i am really grumpy now.
and yes,
i am the mom that brought two kids with runny noses to the children's museum.
spreading our germs like wildfire.
how insensitive.
i know.
have no fear,
no one has a fever.
and i'm sure there are worse germs there than the ones we brought.
we left with one black eye.
brennan.
his left.
who ran into the edge of the chime playing thing.
after tripping over his own shoe.
it was really sad.
and he keeps telling me he's fine.
and his eye doesn't hurt.
so i shouldn't look at.
touch it.
or talk about it anymore.
ok:)
tonight i will be much more careful about what bribes i give out at 3 in the morning.
or wait,
wasn't it 5?