"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

dear chase {today you turned 1.}

dear chase,
today you turned 1.
brennan blew out your candle.
your cousins, dad, max, and i all cheered you on.
you tried to grab the candle about ten times before it was blown out.
andrea held you and kept you safe while i took about a thousand pictures of it all.
you ate your cupcake the tidiest i have ever seen a baby eat a 1st baby cupcake.
i didn't put a bib on you b/c i love your chubby chest and arms.
i thought for sure we'd be cleaning cake and frosting off of your tummy for hours after,
but you just picked up perfect little bite sized bites and ate
including half of the paper wrapper.
you might have eaten 3 quarters of the wrapper.
b/c there was barely anything left of it at all by the time we realized what you were gnawing on.
it was so funny.
i made cupcakes with a reese's peanut butter cup inside of them 
and chocolate and peanut butter frosting.
you were so pleased.
i just can't get over how you ate your cupcake without getting any mess on yourself 
other than your hands and face.
it has to be some kind of baby record.
all day you played in the sandbox.
sometimes the older kids would come and scoop sand onto your legs,
but most of the time you were just happy to dig in the sand all by yourself.
you can play in the sandbox for half an hour by yourself in the backyard.
sometimes i put your out there while i need to do something in the kitchen.
i run back and forth checking on you about every 2 minutes,
and you are always sitting there digging in the sand.
you crawled over to the slide with max and she played peek-a-boo with you there for a long time.
i was inside frosting your cupcakes.
you were such a good boy all day.
you took two naps,
you drank your milk out of a sippy cup.
you wouldn't stay out of the kitchen and pantry.
i kept chasing you in and out over and over and over again.
finally dad remembered that we used to put rubber bands on the knobs when max was a baby,
so he popped two babies on our side by side cabinets
and vwallah.
i was SO excited,
and couldn't believe that i had forgotten that we used to do that until now.
you have red hair.
but it's getting lighter.
especially over the last few weeks.
b/c we've been outside in the sun a lot.
people stop me in the store to ooo and ahhh over your red hair and blue eyes.
your eyes are so so so blue.
when you look up at me in the sun,
it looks like the most crystal clear blue ocean staring right back at me.
your skin is the softest baby skin i can ever remember feeling in my life.
you have blonde eyelashes that glisten in the sun.
and blonde eyebrows.
and perfectly pink lips.
when you are just out of the bath it feels like satin.
SOFTER than satin.
it's amazing.
and it's so soft and gushy that my hands could just lotion you all day and all night.
your chest and arms are the best.
you still let me feed you from a spoon, 
but you love to grab your food with your chubby cabbage patch hands 
and feed yourself the most.
i love that your feed yourself the most.
you can eat everything we eat.
i always bite your grapes in half,
smoosh your blueberries just a little,
pinch off dime sized pieces of your quesadillas,
and cut up your spaghetti and meat,
but the spaghetti strings always hang out of your mouth.
you slurp them in or use the back of your hand to maneuver them down the good ol' hatchet.
you know what you like and cannot be tricked into eating what you don't want to eat.
your tongue starts pushing out what you don't want and then you usually smear your fist all over your face until it's gone for good.
it's like watching a crash in slow motion.
but fast.
you know?
when you're done,
you're done.
you get bored when you're done.
and entertain yourself by playing air hockey with your food across your tray 
until all of your food is at the bottom on your highchair.
on the
it's great.
someday we will have hardwood there,
and i will always remember and talk about how i used to pick up food off of the carpet under the kitchen table and high chair that used to be there.
i don't want to think about the high chair not being there.
you are the fastest crawler i have ever seen.
you can get across a room in record time.
you're freaky fast.
like jimmy johns.
but faster.
you love to hold a car in your hand and crawl around with it while the wheels turn.
especially if it makes noise.
you bob up and down and pump your legs whenever music comes on.
i remember max used to do this too.
i don't know if brennan did, but i'm guessing he probably did.
it's just so cute.
today you opened a winnie the pooh singing birthday card and did your dancing bob and leg shake.
then you would close the card,
open it again.
do your dancing bob and leg shake.
over and over and over again.
you are by FAR the most difficult baby to get your diaper changed.
it is worse than dressing an octopus.
or that alien from independence day.
i have given you cookies,
toys {that never really works},
medicine bottles,
but mostly i just try to make loud high pitched sounds and funny faces.
i am 100% positive i look ridiculous.
you just roll your body over,
and i stand there in the most contorted poses like a weird game of twister,
trying to flip you back over and not get any poo anywhere.
usually i just sit there laughing b/c i envision how funny i must be looking right at that very moment.
like if i were on the tee-vee.
but sometimes i just let you crawl away naked.
until i decide i'd better just wrestle a diaper onto you before i end up cleaning up pee out of my carpet too.
sometimes i will pin you down and start to tickle you or blow into your armpits, 
and you will laugh and laugh and laugh.
and do your deep baby man chuckle,
and then you start to cry so i try to put your diaper on again,
and then you roll over again,
and try to twist your way out,
and then i blow on your belly and you laugh,
and we do this over
and over
and over.
and a diaper always makes it onto your bum eventually.
and then it's time to change your bum again before too long.
i love it when dad takes a turn.
b/c then i get to laugh and the both of you.
this week you have been coming up to me,
standing up,
and then letting go.
and you stand there for 2 seconds holding onto nothing,
just standing all by your own big boy self,
and then you look at me all surprised.
and then you fall down onto your bum.
and i clap for you.
and then you do it again.
and i can see that you are so proud of yourself.
and i'm so proud of you too:)
and then i get scared b/c i know you'll be walking soon.
and i am never in any kind of a rush for that.
but it's just so exciting when you first do it anyway.
so i'm a little excited b/c i love to watch you grow.
you crawled up the entire big staircase all by yourself last week.
no one even knew the gate was open.
you came around the hall corner, 
and i was scared to death that you had done it.
and relieved that you didn't look backwards and fall down to the bottom.
i still get anxious thinking about it.
you love it when people chase you.
today brennan chased you around the kitchen table, 
and you laughed and squealed the entire time.
i was so happy to see my two boys playing together and happy.
you love to play in the doll house with max.
she puts her dolls all over the doll house, 
and you bang your guys {and sometimes the princesses} on the different levels.
you love to play with the princesses.
i put you in her room by yourself sometimes with the door closed,
if i need to dry my hair or get dressed without chasing you around the upstairs, 
and you just love to play with all of the toys in the doll house.
and then you eventually make your way to the baby monitor and unplug it,
and then i come in to get you.
you wake up around 6am, 
dad goes downstairs,
pours and warms a bottle of milk for you,
and then you drink it in your crib, 
and if we are lucky you fall back asleep for a couple more hours.
but sometimes you poop and then you don't go back to sleep.
but you stay in your room and talk to yourself until the other kids wake up, 
and then we come in to get you.
i feel like you are the first real baby i have ever had.
which is strange b/c you are our third baby.
but there are the big kids and then there's you.
the baby man.
and we all love that you are the baby in our family.
i think it's b/c the first baby is a shock,
the second baby i like playing house {at least it was for me},
and then the third baby is just real life.
you cry when people take toys away from you.
a cry like someone has hurt you b/c you're so mad.
you wake up more during the night at this age than any of our other babies.
you LOVE graham crackers and milk.
when we are walking them over to you,
you clench your fists, smile REALLY REALLY BIG,
make little excited baby man noises,
and your entire body starts to shake b/c you're so excited.
you said "dada" once and pointed to dad.
dad is always the winner in this department of firsts.
but now you say "mom" all of the time.
i can hear you saying it over the monitor in the mornings,
calling out to me from your crib.
it makes me want to get out of bed and come to get you.
you crawl over to me and crawl up my legs and say it.
i love to hear your sweet voice say "mom."
you mimic other things i do to.
like when i say "blah" and stick out my tongue if you're touching something yucky.
you do it and make your own "blah."
you are so so busy.
i thought you were going to be a tee-vee baby,
but i don't think that anymore.
i love to hear your jabber away to yourself.
and squawk your baby man squawk.
lately you've been yelling out in a loud kind of talking voice when you want or need something.
your facial expressions could make us a fortune.
i love to watch your brain think about things.
your favorite thing to do inside is to put things into bins and buckets, 
and then take them out.
sometimes you dump them out,
but usually you put them in one by one,
and take them out one by one.
with vigor.
we all love to watch you do it.
you chase balls around like a cat chase's {ha} a toy with catnip.
i am laughing right now b/c i'm realizing how much you love to CHASE things.
you love the shower.
you would sit under it and stick your tongue out for a drink forever.
you are shy.
when new people come to our house 
you put your head down on my shoulder and lay there really still for awhile.
it is one of my most favorite things you do.
i could hold you on my hip like that all day.
so calm and sweet.
i do hold you on my hip almost all day,
but usually you are trying to squirm forward, 
side to side, 
and all around.
except when i'm walking around the house.
then you just hold onto my shoulder and are just happy to be carried wherever i go.
but the thing i will remember most about you 
are all of your sweet baby sounds.
your sweet baby man sounds.
i adore you.
every chubby inch of you.
and i love to kiss your perfectly pink lips.
and comb your little red hair.


Sue said...

Happy birthday to the baby man!


Camillia said...

So sweet and so cute. The past year has just flown by. I'm with you, it's exciting to watch our babies grow up but a little sad too. Happy birthday, baby man!