i am angry.
so angry i feel like crying.
at least i have felt like it for the entire morning.
there must be something wrong with me.
can you have post pardom when your baby is 10 months old???
ok, ok, i'm being dramatic.
it's not post pardom.
it's very reminiscent of the feeling.
i feel like i'm drowning.
i feel frustrated.
i feel like SCREAMING!
and i think i did when brennan threw his fork across the room today.
i screamed at the ground.
so i wouldn't scream at him.
a little fork.
shouldn't constitute a mental breakdown.
it's the whining.
the not listening.
just generally terrorizing max that's getting to me.
i've tried empathy with him.
how would he like it?
i've tried time outs.
i've tried threats.
i've tried manipulation.
i've tried asking nicely.
i just don't know what to do.
i'm at a loss.
the sane person inside me is saying,
"this is just a phase. he will grow out of it."
but the insane person inside of me that has had enough is walking around angry.
angry at the 2 year old for not listening and being mean.
angry at myself for not figuring out a good way to help him through this.
isn't that what "good moms" do?
find genius ways to help their children work through their problems.
well today, i'm not feeling like a "good mom."
i'm feeling like an angry one.
i think i need therapy.
or a vacation.