"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Friday, October 25, 2013

but mostly, texting.

sometimes when my phone rings,
i think about how i want to answer it.
but i know that if i do,
they will know.
they will know,
and they will find me!
and sometimes it's like this dare i have with them.
or me.
i'm going to answer this call.
take a deep breath.
i double dog dare you to answer this call!
do it
do it
do it
do it
sometimes i'll try to bribe them. 
you know,
"if you can go outside until i'm off the phone i'll give you 2 oreos!
halloween oreos!
or a pony!"
ok, i would never really promise a pony, 
but in my heart i want to.
anything to answer this one call!
and then i dare them.
"i dare you to stay outside the entire 2 minutes i am on the phone with _____."
and usually that just doesn't work.
actually, it's never worked.
and most of the time i end up with 
two monkeys wrapped around each leg,
and another monkey crying.
and i stand there thinking to myself,
welp, this is what you get for answering your phone emily.
you know, when i answer my phone with my children awake,
against my better judgement.
and it think,
"this is funny!"
like legititmately funny.
Doc Holliday from tombstone bonefied funny.
except without the boots and dying in the hospital.
you know, more like laying in the bed and you can't move,
because you just can't move,
and it's just funny.
wait, it was funny because he DID NOT have his boots on.
that's right.
forget about the boots.
usually why it's most funny is because i picture them all grown up,
hanging onto each of my legs,
another one crying,
in their adult grown up selves,
and then i start thinking about how it would really make a good saturday night live skit.
like flies on meat;)
every time.
and there's just no escaping it.
and so i usually have to get off of the phone,
and i'm just standing there laughing.
hugging someone up who is crying,
breaking up world war 3,
or helping max talk through whatever someone has done to offend her 3 1/2 year old self.
{note: i have found that it is really hard to be a 3 1/2 year old girl. 
lots of upsetting things to get through in a day.}
and then i end up walking through the house the rest of the day 
finding what kept them quiet for the first 30 seconds i was on the phone.
like silverware towers,
and toilet paper escapades in the bathroom.

and i think about how much
i love these tiny little humans.
and i even though i'm exhausted at the end of every day,
i love how alive my house is with them in it.
and then i think about how grateful i am for texting.
and my washer and dryer.
and my dishwasher.
but mostly, texting:)

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