because i don't want them getting an inch and taking a mile or something responsible like that.

{she didn't even cry. i have planned for two years for her to cry.

because she has always cried on the first day of anything.

also birthday parties. she cries when we drop her off at birthday parties.

but she didn't cry on her first day of kindergarten. and it was amazing.

i remember driving home thinking i'm so happy that she's so happy

on her first day of kindergarten. and then she came home and told me she didn't want to wear the frozen necklace to school anymore. because it bit the back of her neck all day long.}

...

max isn't currently sleeping.

this is crazy to me.

she was my BEST sleeper as a baby.

{dean has slept in longer stretches than her earlier, but he is a horrible car seat sleeper, so max STILL wins.}

she would sleep anywhere.

she was like a bird.

all you had to do was cover her up,

and she was out.

it was amazing.

you could transfer her from her crib to her car seat and back to her crib,

and she wouldn't even open one lid.

we would take her to movies.

out to dinner.

to appointments.

any time of the day!

and i never had to worry about having a fussy baby with me.

i didn't even really need to feed her to keep her happy.

she would take giant naps twice a day and sleep from 7:30pm-10am as she got older.

every

single

night.

and she NEVER cried.

like NOT EVER.

i'm not kidding,

and i know you don't believe me,

because i wouldn't believe me,

except for i saw it with my very own eyes.

also, i have witnesses.

not even for her shots.

the nurse for our old pediatrician STILL comments about it 

when we see her because she couldn't believe it either.

she was a dream baby.

the ones you only hear about,

and i swear to you she was my gift from heaven for not killing brennan,

who literally screamed for 16 hours a day.

god bless baby max because we probably wouldn't have had any more kids if it hadn't been for her.

so this amazing max,

is a worrier.

when she's laying in bed at night she yells down things like

"are you guys still there?"

"did you lock the doors?"

"i saw a shadow!"

"i'm scared!"

"i need someone to lay with me!"

have you ever read llama llama red pajama?

or any of the junie b jones books?

well they are max

to

the

t.

we've taught her to look at books while she's falling asleep.

put water bottles by her bed.

set up multiple night lights

shakies

lovies

barbies

baby dolls

books.

and the dang dodgers hello kitty animal the plowman's gave her {go giants!!!}

it's like a full on flea market in her bed at night.

these are the things she requires to fall asleep.

also brennan not being in there.

well now,

she wakes up in the night.

turns on ALL of the lights.

which wakes up chase.

who wakes up us.

so we put them all back to bed,

turn off the lights,

and then some awful repeat button gets pushed 

and this process gets repeated in 1 hour to 3 hour cycles all night long.

i'm known as a night owl.

i now go to bed at 10pm every night.

sometimes 9:30.

'nuff said.

we've tried every piece of advice anyone has to offer.

rocks to take her bad dreams 

{although she doesn't complain of bad dreams 

because i swear this child isn't in a deep enough sleep to have dreams anyway--

but like i said, we're trying everything.}

telling her to say prayers when she wakes up,

telling her she doesn't need to come in and wake us up.

spending more alone time with her during the day

spending more alone time with her at bedtime.

benedryl

singing the sound of music.

you name it,

we've tried it.

and i'm thinking that maybe

it just can't be fixed.

and this morning,

while sean and i were laying in bed,

he started laughing,

and i was all talking in desperation like,

"we did everything right!

we taught them how to sleep in their own beds!

we didn't spoil her as a baby!

healthy sleep habbits!

no milk in the night!"

and he was all,

"i know, that's why it's funny."

and then i was all

"i get why people forget about doing things the right way with the fourth,

because by then you know none of it matters anyway."

and then i heard chase banging on the wall,

because by this point i had put them both in the same room

hoping THAT would help.

desperation folks.

it leads you to do CRAZY things.

like thinking two little kids will go to back to sleep at 6:15am if you put them in the same room MAYBE????

so of course that didn't end well,

and i ended up putting chase in time out at 6:42am for talking.

because i don't want them getting an inch and taking a mile or something responsible like that.

and i'm pretty sure that's when i decided that i should send chase to preschool today,

even though maybe he still had a lingering cough.

and do you wanna know what they're doing 

RIGHT NOW

upstairs in their rooms?

playing "nighttime".

where they lay in their beds and pretend to sleep.

they turn off all the lights so it's dark.

and close the blinds so it's dark.

yep.

i know.

how 'bout THAT to give a gal a good laugh.

good grief.

i love these crazy kids.

the dreamland is over.

i can't believe kindergarten is over.

the dreamland of half in the real world of school days we've been in are over.

the dreamland being the one thing that annoyed me all year long.

half day kindergarten:)

and as much as i'm ready to say goodbye to it,

and all of the annoying things about it,

i'm sad to see it go in the most ironic way.

because it was the last of our days home with me.

at least during the school year anyway.

and even when it was hard, and i was dying for him to be gone all day,

{or least for more than 2 hours and 45 minutes},

i can look back on all of those half days of kindergarten 

where we read books at the table over lunch,

put chase to bed for his nap,

and taught brennan how to read,

i sit here and wonder what i was complaining about anyway.

funny how that happens.

he just can't wait to eat lunch at school next year and finally get to go to recess.

and i'm dying to know how we're going to do homework during chase's nap time again 

when brennan doesn't get home from school until after chase wakes up from his nap time?

#problemsthatarentreallyproblems #justsayin

at least we know he's not a serial killer {a thank you note}

Dear Mrs. Ames,

Thank you for giving us 

the mellow group of girls, 

and the quietest boy in the entire Kindergarten.

It made for the best 

Kindergarten zoo field trip 

I've ever been on!

Wait...

Anyway, now I know 

FOR SURE you really do love me.

Because I saw some of the other groups.

God Bless you:)

Love,

Brennan's Mom

P.S.

Also, Brennan was in tears in the snake house.

Like he couldn't even speak because he was stifling a cry that gasped for air, and then burst into an I can't breathe 

because I'm so scared 

and I'm holding my breath so i don't cry kind of cry,

with huge tears rolling out of his big brown eyes.

And I was all whispering in his ears,
"Did you poop in your pants???"
I was panicked because you know,

NO extra underwear-O folks and we're on a field trip at the zoo.

Phew, he shook he his no.

What on earth could it be though???

that's what i was thinking.

and then it hit me.

the upside down turtle.

because the dad in other group was all,

"should one of us flip it back over?"

and i was like,

"i don't think we should touch it."

and he was all,

"they can die if they're on their backs too long."

and i was like,

"really?! wow, i hope someone gets a zoo helper. 

ready to go brennan?"

and the man goes on,

"yeah, they suffocate on their backs because their big shell makes their lungs collapse!!!"

and i'm sitting there giving him the "wow that's interesting" face that i do when people tell me factual stuff.

but mostly i was just trying to bribe the 4yr old and 2yr out of the stinky snake house with fruit snacks and pirate booty and cars for their 16th birthdays--anything to get them away before someone had to start CPR on the upside down turtle.

and that's when brennan started crying.

but he wasn't even that close to us so that's why i thought he pooped his pants because why else would a child burst into tears in the middle of the snake house anyway?!

but you know he didn't poop his pants,

he was just worried about that little upside down turtle dying.

"SUFFOCATING!!!"

and so that's when i said,

"yeah, why don't YOU flip him over, that was a great idea!"

because he was also talking about how his dad raised giant tortoises, and how he was trained in 

flipping them over and stuff like that.

and then i was like,

"don't forget to wash your hands."

after it was clear that the turtle was now safe and sound on the right side of his belly again.

and then brennan told me about how the two turtles were fighting and the one turtle flipped the other turtle over, and that's how it went down.

and on the way out i let the zoo helper know 

we already had it covered.

go us.

so happy that brennan is NO animal killer or torturer.

and that he did not poop his pants.

chase on other hand was completely fascinated,

denying me as his mother on the way out because i dared to pull him away from the front row show of it all.

and then we had to wait on the other side of lawn while the entire group took a picture with the giant metal elephant 

because brennan is still petrified of that darn thing.

going on 5 and 1/2 years folks.

5 and 1/2 years.

click here to remember.

note: field trips are so much easier when you're not the teacher that has to ride the bus with 120 kindergartners:)

THE END.

love, emily

whichever;)

not so bad afterall

maybe half day kindergarten isn't such a bad gig after all. 

who knew?!

the love voice {kinder thanksgiving}

6 thanksgiving centers,

about 10 glasses of spilled water,

23 paper bag vests,

13 pilgrims,

10 native americans,

turkey slices,

olives,

turkey candy corn feather cookies,

marshmallow counting,

paper turkeys,

bingo,

and

a partridge and a pear tree.

meet ryann.

brennan's first crush.

:):):)

he has a look when she's around.

this sweet 5 year old,

dreamy eye kind of look.

and he always makes sure she sees his work when it's done.

like when he bites his turkey cookie,

and he wants her to see it.

"ryyyyyyaaaannnnnn, look at my cooooookieeee ryyyyyaaaannnn"

{insert image of cheezy smile here}

in his sweet voice.

you know,

the kind of voice you'd use when you're talking to a baby, 

but not the high pitched kind.

the "i'm going to marry ryann"

because i really like to be around her,

and her hair is pretty kind.

and really,

she is just the cutest little thing.

someday he's going to kill me for this.

but for now,

i'm just gonna document it all:)

shhhh, don't tell

miss kim: max told me she's going to marry brennan.

max: yep!

brennan: no! i'm not marrying max! you don't marry your sister!

i'm only gonna marry ryann. not the boy ryan. the girl ryann. from my school.

{cue max crying.}

...

his first crush.

brown eyes.

brown hair.

always messy, 

but in the most beautiful kind of way.

teensy little thing.

with a spark in her step.

these are the things you know when you help out in the school.

like who ryann is when your son tells you he wants to marry her.

stuff like that.

awesome stuff like that.

shhh, don't tell;)

CLICK:)

learning to read over here.

exciting business!!!

bat

cat

mat

pat

{grandpa was so excited that brennan can read his name}

sat

hat

fat

nat

{we didn't worry about the "g" there}

then he moved onto

pot

dot

then

mop

top

stop

at which point he told me he was done.

and that a 4 letter word was super great reading.

a BIG word.

so fun to watch him go.

and that darn letter C.

not even individual enough to make it's own sound.

i know, C, sometimes we all struggle with that.

but really, you have to borrow K and S?

at least X combines them both.

i'm having flashbacks of LIT1 in college with missy...

hardest class in my entire college career.

with the greatest teacher ever.

mr. allen.

it was just that it required 6 units of work,

but you only got 2 units of credit.

i still have nightmares that i have to take the LIT1 state exam again,

and i haven't studied for it.

that i have forgotten all of the material from when it took the class.

b/c i took it 8 years ago.

or something.

LIT 1.

traumatizing.

that's we what call that.

boy,

i'm sure glad i had to take it.

and boy,

i'm sure glad linsey's mom dropped off these cards to help me remember why i took it.

because there's nothing more amazing than watching your child learn to read.

CLICK:)

growing pains {1st week of kindergarten}

the cherry tomatoes in the center of the bush are always the trickiest to get out.

i

love

sunflowers:)

welp, 

let's wrap up the first week of kindergarten so far...

day 1:

sad he's gone. 

put away every piece of laundry in my house.

everything is clean and quiet.

celebrate with chick-fil-a.

this is gonna be great!

day 2:

really, 8:15am again?

this is early.

yes, you can play at cade's house again.

max is bored out of her mind.

chase is teething and whining.

my house is a mess.

we watch tv all day.

go to ikea at night.

brennan goes into the play center.

i love ikea.

brennan and max stay up late laughing and playing in bed until after 9pm,

even though they were put to bed at 7:45.

day 3:

brennan doesn't want to go to school.

why does kindergarten have to be so early?

he wants to know why i signed him up for mornings, 

and when he can watch tv and play with a phone?

chase is teething and miserable.

he won't eat.

must be held.

fever hotter than Hades.

green poo.

i'm still sick with a cold.

going on day 8.

max is bored out of her mind.

she refuses to watch tv.

i drag brennan and cade to my house, 

promising them mac & cheese and an hour of lego batman on the wii.

brennan thinks i'm the meanest mom on the planet.

he and cade want to live together.

they are mad that susie and i won't let them.

i feel sad b/c i don't feel like i've seen brennan in 3 days.

day 4:

sean gets irritated with the safety patrol about the drop off rules for kindergartners.

we laugh about it when he gets home, and i am still in bed barely opening my eyes 

{i was up with chase and another Hades hot fever last night, so hot it burned my lips, i kid you not. gave him some motrin, rocked him for half an hour while his fever came down, 

and remembered how much i love holding a baby that sits on my chest 

all snuggled and sleeping--flashbacks of life before tubes.},

and then we talked about how he'd better just walk him in every day until brennan can walk by himself from one side of the school to the other from the drop off line to the kindergarten part of the school.

i complain to my friends about how i don't like the drop off and pick up routine 

while i'm visiting teaching, one says she saw sean this morning, 

we laugh about that, continue to gripe about how people get out of their cars 

and the pick up and drop off at the school is annoying.

then i left to pick up brennan and try to avoid going through the pick up line,

by parking on the street in front of the school,

behind another car that did the same thing

{i'm thinking that my luck is on today and that i must have hit it at JUST the right time

with all of these open front curb spots available. i was feeling SO awesome},

and then when i'm walking back with brennan, 

i see a motor officer 

writing 

me 

a 

ticket:)

yep.

and i realize 

that the reason why no one was parking there 

was because it was illegal to park there.

he voids my ticket, 

i thank him profusely,

all in front of the principal and two kindergarten teachers,

and other parents following the pick up line rules.

--SO EMBARRASSING--

but not really b/c then i walk off with a smile 

b/c thank the heavens above!!!

for the first time in my entire life

i got a warning.

and

not

a

ticket.

and in my defense,

i really did believe it was ok to park there.

bless that motor officer for having pity on a 1st time kindergartner mom.

we come home,

brennan tells me i'm the meanest mom for not letting him play with cade,

even though they've played after school for 3 days in a row,

AND i make him tell me about school when he gets home instead of watching tv.

it feels good to be getting into a new routine.

our garden is bursting.

max is my gardening helper.

i love it.

but she is just mostly lonely for brennan.

he tells me he loves kindergarten,

he's learning the pledge of allegiance,

and they are supposed to wear red tomorrow.

i can already see he's more grown up today

than he was on monday.

i'm so proud and happy for him.

and he says he's really tired,

and doesn't want to go to morning kindergarten tomorrow.

i wonder what will happen on DAY 5?

...

this is the only picture i have of brennan from this entire week 

b/c i haven't seen him 

in 

4 

days.

weird.

i'm just a sucker for pomp and circumstance.

"i hope there's gonna be show and tell, 
'cause i love show and tell."
-brennan
...
age: 5

favorite color: blue

best friend: cade

favorite animal: tiger

what do you want to be when you grow up: policeman

where do you want to live: california

favorite sport: soccer

favorite food: macaroni and cheese

favorite thing about yourself: being myself

favorite movie: batman

favorite super hero: batman

favorite holiday: halloween and christmas

favorite song: phillip phillips

favorite tv show: batman

favorite day: every day

favorite treat: cookies

favorite drink: rootbeer soda

favorite number: 6

favorite toy: superman

what are you most happy about this summer: mom

favorite memory about summer: going to the zoo with cade and blake

what are you really good at doing: jumping

favorite thing to do at home: play toys with max

what super power do you wish you had: 
flying and strong b/c i like being strong and i've always wanted to fly

favorite book: lego star wars

what is hard for you: nothing

what makes you happy: a hug and a kiss, but from mom's that don't wear lipstick on sundays

i started to tear up when he gave me a hug and a kiss.

and again when he walked under that banner on the red carpet.

so i figured i'd better just walk fast to my car if i was going to cry.

but by the time i got to the car, 

i couldn't muster one lousy tear.

i'm just a sucker for pomp and circumstance i guess.

 ...
susie and i picked the boys up and took all of the kids to chick-fil-a.
where they told us that they read a story,
had recess,
found their bins,
were unsure if they had name tags on their desks or not,
and really, couldn't remember where their desks were anyway.
brennan told me he was sitting by a girl with hair.
clearly disappointing to him, which i thought was hilarious.
and then they ran off to play in the play zone.

 oh to be finished with your 1st day of kindergarten.
...
right before bed we couldn't find monkey anywhere.
all of a sudden brennan said he remembered where he was.
in
his
backpack.
and i was all, "why??!! monkey shouldn't be going to school!"
and he was like, "i sneaked him into my backpack."
and i was all, "how come?"
and he was like, "so i wouldn't be scared or sad at school."
at which point my heart melted,
my brows furrowed all puppy dog like,
and i had to climb into bed with him.
so i could hold his hand,
with monkey on his chest,
to watch him fall asleep.
thank heavens for little boys.

there's always going to be somebody that doesn't like peaches.

we laid out all of his choices.

it took him about 5 seconds to decide.

then we labeled everything but his underwear and socks,

even though he begged me to do his socks,

i would not.

don't know why i wouldn't,

just seemed excessive i guess.

plus really,

if he actually takes off his socks and loses them,

i don't really want them back. 

...

i chased little Hawaiian umbrellas around my patio for about 2 minutes

while i was trying to set the table. 

until i realized tape was really what i needed.

when i came back,

max was chasing Hawaiian umbrellas around the patio.

and i laughed.

kindred souls.

clearly.

but once i taped them down,

they were a hit.

i gave each of my kids a plastic hawaiian necklace,

and brennan was the first to suggest we cheers.

the green puffs were my favorite part.

and it was just so fun to fuss over.

inspiration here.

i've only been waiting 5 years to do it:)

and i have been counting down the days this week to enjoy it.

{even though chase threw food at me almost the entire time.}

spaghetti and meatballs, with green beans and rolls, per brennan's request.

it wasn't "if" he was going to touch the balls,

just "when."

his little world is about to explode into a thousand times bigger.

and i'm terrified and ecstatic for him all at the same time.

like we're opening a brand new book we've never read before.

and i feel like we're going to Disneyland.

with the buzz of the first day jitters all around.

so excited you can hardly sleep!

after dinner he told me that he's most excited about making new friends,

and most nervous about making new friends.

so i told him that if he's nervous about making new friends,

that maybe the other kids might be nervous too,

and he smiled at me and said "yeah," 

a little excited about thinking about it all.

and then i told him to be nice to everybody,

and always

always

always

tell the truth.

b/c i used to be a big fat liar,

and all it got me was trouble;)

and then i told him that no matter how big and juicy a peach is,

there's always going to be somebody that doesn't like peaches.

and he rolled his eyes and told me that i already told him that yesterday,

so i didn't need to tell him that again today.

i can't believe my baby is going to kindergarten tomorrow.

here we go...