"experience is what you get when you didn't get what you wanted." -randy pausch

Friday, February 21, 2014

the red eye. {DAY 10}

{max's birthday--except we told her it wasn't}
the red eye is what the Hawaiians do to the tourists as some kind of sick joke.
thank you for coming and spending all of your money here!
our gift to you is the red eye!
oh, and by the way,
remember how your same EXACT flight over here took 5 hours and 45 minutes?
and your children were awake
because it was during the day the entire time?
and your dvd battery died because it was such a long flight?
as a special added bonus
to show our love and appreciation for your tourism the last 10 days,
the red eye will be shortened to 3 hours and 45 minutes on the way home!
this is going to be so exciting because it will leave at 9:30pm,
and then by the time your children finally fall asleep after take off,
they will get anywhere from 2 hours to half an hour of sleep,
leaving you with about 10 minutes of shut eye 
before the captain come over the speaker to tell you it's time to land!
just in time to arrive on the west coast before the sun even comes up.
wait, that's not it,
there's more!
because you were today's lucky winner we have an exclusive tourists package to offer you today!
you will be so excited BECAUSE...
instead of having an hour layover as shown on your ticket,
you will get to enjoy an extended 3 hour vacation in the world famous los angelos international airport!
don't worry about none of the vendors being open because it's so early.
once normal human hours begin {about 2 hours after your arrival to LAX} 
you will have the opportunity to buy 1 bottle of water for $5 AND one pack of $3 gum 
while you your and your children walk around like zombies 
and talk really short to each other about everything.
don't feel sorry for me?
yeah, me neither;)
our kids were even champs!
not a peep from one of them.
still, i hate the red eye.
ain't nobody that loves the red eye.
it took us three days before we didn't fall asleep standing up to recover.
we walked in the door from the airport,
put chase to bed,
and sean and i fell asleep on the couch for 3 hours.
we still don't know exactly what max and brennan did for those 3 hours.
we do know for sure that two nights later max, 
still being on hawaii time,
was flooding the upstairs bathroom toilet instead of going to bed.
LAX before any shops opened.
the unknowing birthday girl.
the ride home from the airport.
the epitome of exhaustion.
he couldn't even hold his arms to his body he was so tired.
don't you just want to squish and kiss his cheeks?!

1 comment:

Amy said...

After spending so much wonderful time in HI? Yeah, I don't feel sorry for you. Well, maybe a little.